Dear Tony

Dear Tony,

Since you are the only one who reads this blog faithfully, or only say that you read it faithfully, this week’s blog is going to be a letter to you. I can’t believe we're 38 and you have three kids. Dude, we’re like grown up now. Do you remember how cool we thought we were in college? It’s a wonder that we didn’t get beat up. Anyway, yesterday I had a book signing at Lily’s. It was kind of weird to have these people spend $16.95 ($18.31 after taxes) to read something that I wrote. I hope they don’t read it and don’t like. Do you think people can return books? I hope not. I’ve already spent my advance. So, do you ever think about political office? You told me in college that one day you were going to be governor of Louisiana. Is that still the plan? So, you don’t think you look the same as you did back in college? I totally still look like I’m 21. Well, except the hair is growing on my back instead of my head. Oh yeah, two people that I hadn’t seen since college showed up. One was Michelle Vidrine who I was really good friends with my freshman year and the other one was Muffy, a girl I met in my first English class. She’s the one that convinced me it was cool to wear biker shorts to class. I’m sorry but in 100% weather, biker shorts are not cool. I went to her wedding in college and I never got her a wedding gift. I feel so bad. I’d give her a book but she already bought one. Oh well. So tonight I had another book signing. It was at this cool store in Abbeville called The Depot. It was kind of a book signing/party because there were drinks and meat pies. They were really good and this guy named Chef Bobby donated them. His food is amazing. So that’s a party, right? It was kind of cool. I saw a lot of people that I hadn’t seen in a long time. I forgot how friendly people here are. Everyone in the Parish has been very supportive. So I guess what I’m saying, Tony, is you need to buy the book. And you need to buy your parents a book because they were like parents to me and I’d like them to have one. But not a free one. One that cost $18.31 plus tax. I know they’d want you to pay full price for it. Hey, remember when we made that deal that when we got old, the richer of the two would pay off the other one’s credit card debt? Well, guess what. I’m thinking of going to Aruba next month and I don’t have a job. So, I guess that means you win. I’m just kidding. I wouldn’t make you pay up on that debt. We were so stupid in college. But now we’re grown men with ear hair and arthritis. You have a great career, a beautiful wife and three kids. And I’m living in my momma’s house in the same bed in the same room I grew up in minus the Lionel Richie poster. But, I wouldn’t trade it for the world right now. We need to meet up soon. Let me figure out my schedule and I'll email you. Or write it on this blog. So, if you really read this like you say you do, you’ll send me an email and tell me that you read it.

Jake